By Michele Jai Johnson ***
Have you ever noticed that sometimes when you try to “fix your life”, i.e. organize, maintain your cool, be nicer to others, or create things to enable your life to be all-around-better, that certain obstacles will come up which question exactly what you’re trying to create?
I’m sure everyone has experienced this at one time or another – you’re on a roll, your week is going great, your children are as perfect as they can be and your business or work seems to be flying high – then BOOM. Something happens to take away the excitement, the good vibrations, and everything suddenly seems bleak.
I’ve wondered if this is some kind of test, you know, to see how bad I really want all of this goodness I’ve created and achieved. I call this a “critical moment”. It’s the moment when the BOOM happens – the moment when you feel powerless, when only yesterday you were feeling so powerful. So what do you do?
Here is a list of 8 things you can do in these critical moments. These tasks can be used to alleviate the current emotional stress and return you to being a creator of your own good. You can do one or more of these things during a critical time…whichever feels right for you.
Give the emotion and the circumstance over to your God and just breathe deeply and pray.
Crying releases the tightness your body may be experiencing. Emotional stress to me is like a storm brewing inside. I can physically and mentally hear, see, and feel the thunder and lightning racking my inner world. Crying is the rain that comes during the storm. It’s cleansing to the body and soul just as a summer rain shower cleanses the earth. I feel refreshed afterwards, just as the earth smells clean and refreshed after a shower. Do whatever you can to cry. Go in a room alone and allow it to come. Watch a sad movie – just find something to encourage the tears to come on out.
releases pent-up stress and emotions as well. Laugh about how ridiculous it is that when you try to create one thing, you subconsciously create additional obstacles. Laugh at the thought of you testing yourself like this and how silly it seems to be saying affirmations and positive statements when you certainly don’t feel like they even apply. Watch a humorous movie or recall a humorous memory. But laugh…it will make you feel better and return you to the state you wish to be in afterwards.
4) Talk it out
…to your spouse or trusted friend or partner. If no one is there, talk to yourself. Ask yourself questions and answer them. This helps to get whatever is going on out in the open. And talking to yourself might cause laughter, which would also be helpful.
5) Do some form of physical exercise
Exercise loosens up your insides as the adrenaline begins flowing. With each move you make during exercise, you can see you haven’t lost control. This seems to help when you are feeling out of control. Because you control each sit up or leg lift or step you take, you slowly realize you are still the one in charge here .
6) Ask someone to hug you
There is something about the physical touch of someone else that helps you to realize a feeling of “support”. A hug from someone lets you know you are not alone and you are supported. If you’re uncomfortable asking for a hug, then GIVE ONE. You’re almost sure to get one in return.
Concentrate on your breath – in and out. Try to slow it down, try to speed it up. See the control you have and experience the relaxation as you do this. Imagine your breath as a movie on the VCR. You can fast-forward it or you can slow it down. Close your eyes and visualize clear breath moving through your body. Just breathe.
Don’t be attached to the outcome. Continue with your efforts and know that they are the right things for you to do at the moment, but surrender to any attachment to outcome. It’s the attachment to outcome, the connection to things being “a certain way”, which brings us pain. Peace comes with letting go, surrendering, and acceptance. It also makes us more open to learning from our experience, instead of resisting it.
All of these things can help. I used every one of them during a recent stressful time I was having. But I didn’t use them at first…at first, I tried to *fight* the emotional feelings. I questioned them and told them to go away! It didn’t work. I had to resort to other measures and after suffering emotional distress almost all day, I finally let go and did every one of the things above.
I performed numbers 1, 4 & 7 on the list first. I felt a bit better. Then I accomplished number 6. I felt a bit more relieved. Then I acted on 2, then 5, then 3. And finally, 8, as suggested by a student of mine. Then it was gone. The distress had finally left my body and I have now returned to being a CREATOR OF MY GOOD and once again, I became powerful! You can, too, if you keep this list handy and try these suggestions during your own critical moments.